They are getting riper by the week lads, seriously  cheesy, even a few ladies
have emparted their tastiest lines to me.

But not all lines bring a smile to my face – this weeks Grande Fromage
has to be the effort of Mathew Lynch  from Meath who spreads it thick and fast with:

"Can I have your picture? Cos I'll want to know I wasn't dreaming tomorrow...'

A line that would melt a lovely girls wellies at a hundred yards with it’s
mighty pong.

Stand up Matthew – you’re this weeks Cheesiest. And remember with great power
comes great responsibility.

A box of Cheese and Onion is on it’s way.

Being one of the most eligible bachelor’s of this fair land, you’d expect me to be fighting off the fairer sex with a very long stick, but surprisingly that is not the case. Oh the ladies aren’t immune to my charms, but I find when I’m faced with a pretty cailin, I get a little tongue-tied. I’m a bit rusty when it comes to the old romance.

Thanksfully though, enough ‘Spud Studs’ have answered the call and very kindly lent me their best and, let’s be honest lads, their cheesiest chat up lines. I’ve already started testing them out on the lovely ladies of Ireland, I’ll report back on my success on that front later.

The cheesiest line this week has come from Mark Cronly, in Kildare. This silver tongued Casanova obviously knocks the ladies dead with the pungent cheese odour of lines like these…                                

"If you were a burger at McDonalds, you'd be a McGorgeous"

Seriously Mark, there’s cheesy and then there’s cheesy - like a Cheese Maker stuck indoors on a hot day.

Fair play Mark, a box of my finest Cheese and Onion is winging its way to you!

They always said I had 'Star' quality, but this wasn't what I had in mind!!!!

Just click on the image to read all about it!

 

As many of you are aware, I had a brief and Royston-esque foray into politics. While I don’t regret running for office, the whole experience has made me aware that something or rather, someone is missing from my life.

Namely, a Mrs. Tayto.

For many years I have been content to be on my own, crisps and my monster truck have been enough, but now I’d like to share my love of cheese and onion with another. I’d like to find the salt to my vinegar if you will. With this in mind, I am announcing a nationwide search to find myself a lovely girl.

So, if you are single and fancy free, and think you would be interested in a spud like me enter you details into my little black book, or if you’re a spud stud and can give me some much needed advice on how to woo the ladies, throw us a chat up line.

Oh, and by the way, no weirdos please.

Mr. T.

So it turns out that I’m not a dab hand at the old sweet talking.

Who’d a thought telling the ladies they’d lovely thick ankles would win you no favours?

Back in the day that was poetry to their ears. It seems I’m a bit out of the loop when it comes to the chat up lines, so I’m relying on you lads out there to supply me with a few sure-fire zingers.

No messin now, I’m in a bad way, all I can say is thank goodness I’m a looker. There’s a whole section of my website, www.mrtayto.ie  dedicated specifically to you lads sendin in your best lines.

I'm talking about being the Goose to my Maverick ...

So get writing and cheese it up lads!

Mr. Tayto